Peace requires preparation

Less than 2 days after the attacks in Brussels, the media are full of references to war: heightened vigilance, arrests and a discourse about defeating evil.

Without wanting to detract from measures deemed politically necessary, the question arises how we can prepare not just for war, but for peace.

When it comes to peace: what needs to happen to stimulate peace and warm coexistence? What assignments can the responsible ministers give to their administrations? What programmes can be rolled out? And above all, what can we take on ourselves?

Just like war, peace is something that needs to be worked on, step by step. It presupposes that we learn to open our hearts, manage our emotions, and make good use of anger and fear. This means learning to express ourselves with conviction and without violence, and hearing the other without being afraid of their conviction. It presupposes developing respect and empathy for people who are different, and learning to resolve conflicts with attention to everyone’s interests. For this, we need to learn to let go of our own solution and creatively look for ways to care for everyone’s needs, interests and values.

These are processes we can gradually become familiar with, and they require discipline, structure and commitment. They form an antidote to cynicism, despair, growing frustration and bitterness. It is crucial today to recognise the power of these transformation processes and to create new possibilities for peace.

A task for everyone

Violence is not the expression of our true nature; it is the expression of a nature that has been subjected to violence. When our fundamental needs, such as love, recognition, belonging, having a place in the whole, self-expression, experiencing meaning in life, equality, sharing… are not nourished, and when we don’t know how to name and express this lack, we are all capable of becoming violent.

It is a matter of civic responsibility to learn to respect and reconcile with our true nature: a citizen who is reconciled with their human nature generates peace and is anything but passive.

Let us do everything we can to develop an attitude of nonviolence and civic responsibility, and encourage others to invest in this too.

Some avenues

• Regularly take time for what you feel. Don’t let emotions build up until they reach the proverbial last straw and explode (or implode).
• Learn to understand and love yourself as a human being with the full range of emotions and moods, so you can also learn to understand and at least respect the other person, even when it’s uncomfortable.
• Let go of old power dynamics to make room for collaboration and trust.
• Develop your natural capacity for empathy, especially when you disagree with the other person.
• Regularly be aware of feelings of joy and gratitude. Acknowledge and celebrate what “is” rather than complaining about what isn’t.

Text inspired by a contribution from Thomas d’Asembourg following the attacks in Paris (November 2015).